All WIP

Snack Blanket

This dip is so smooth it could talk its way out of a parking ticket and so rich it probably has offshore bank accounts. You can keep pretending hummus is exciting, or you can join the revolution. Your call.

Product:

Food product

Status:

Laboratory testing

Estimated launch:

Late 2025

Website:

snackblanket.com

The bad boy of better for you

Most grocery dips are average because they're made for the average consumer. They're designed for people who think that ranch is an adventurous flavour. This isn’t that. It’s bold, it’s different, and honestly, it’s probably not for you. It laughs in the face of "sodium benzoate" and other unpronounceable additives. While other companies play fast and loose with the term "real ingredients," we stick to a simple rule: if your grandma wouldn't recognize it, it's not making it into our dip. Period.

W H Y

Plants made this? Yeah, we’re confused too.

It's never met a snack it didn't like.

You've never met a more adaptable dip. Choose your weapon: chip, cracker, carrot, cucumber, or spoon. One day, we caught my four-year-old niece drinking it out of the bowl, so yeah, it's versatile.

It will haunt you.

Once you taste Snack Blanket, you can't untaste it. It's got a flavour that you'll seriously crave. Prepare to be innocently walking home from work and suddently realize you're in the dip aisle. You've been warned.

An (un)guilty pleasure.

Why is Snack Blanket so good? Because it tastes bad for you. Unlike other things that taste bad for you, you can eat a tub of this stuff and not feel like a toxic wasteland of processed regret. It's actually great for you. What a mind twister.

No tomfoolery.

No fillers. No additives. No cow drama. The brand may bend the rules and play dirty, but the ingredients are cleaner than your conscience after you delete your browser history.

W H Y

Plants made this? Yeah, we’re confused too.

It's never met a snack it didn't like.

You've never met a more adaptable dip. Choose your weapon: chip, cracker, carrot, cucumber, or spoon. One day, we caught my four-year-old niece drinking it out of the bowl, so yeah, it's versatile.

It will haunt you.

An (un)guilty pleasure.

No tomfoolery.

No fillers. No additives. No cow drama. The brand may bend the rules and play dirty, but the ingredients are cleaner than your conscience after you delete your browser history.

W H Y

Plants made this? Yeah, we’re confused too.

It's never met a snack it didn't like.

You've never met a more adaptable dip. Choose your weapon: chip, cracker, carrot, cucumber, or spoon. One day, we caught my four-year-old niece drinking it out of the bowl, so yeah, it's versatile.

It will haunt you.

An (un)guilty pleasure.

No tomfoolery.

No fillers. No additives. No cow drama. The brand may bend the rules and play dirty, but the ingredients are cleaner than your conscience after you delete your browser history.